Clearly one of my New Year’s resolutions isn’t off to a great start! I committed to writing more in 2017 and here we are… February 23, 2017 and I’m writing my first post of the new year…. OOPS…. That said, I do have a valid excuse! I was so busy being committed to my OTHER resolution, that I simply didn’t have time! Are you buying it????
But in all seriousness, it’s true. I have been focused on another resolution and I’ve been semi-successful with that one. You probably remember my last post and felt my nervous energy, my stress level rising, my difficulty managing everything… Well, I decided to do something about it. I decided to become a morning person. Yup, that’s right. I took stock of my life and all of the things I have going on and realized the only time I would ever be able to get for myself, time where I could focus on planning, on writing, on reading, on running, on BREATHING, was long before any of my canines, my tiny humans or my husband were awake. The early bird gets the worm, right? How hard could it be? So upon the recommendation of a client, I bought the book The Miracle Morning: The Not-So-Obvious Secret Guaranteed to Transform Your Life (Before 8AM) and decided that 5:10 am was my new wake up time! Easy breezy, right?
HAVE I MENTIONED THAT I LOVE SLEEP ABOVE JUST ABOUT ANYTHING? Like, I would give up a five star meal, a new pair of shoes (and I LOVE shoes), $500 (I love money), a full body massage, an uninterrupted viewing of “This Is Us” and my soul for sleep. For realz. Sleep is my favorite. I love it, I need a lot of it and I don’t take it for granted. So WHY did I think this was a good idea? Because I decided to do this on December 31 after a week of vacation when I was sleeping until 8:00 am each morning, lounging in my pajamas until 10:00 am and going to bed at about 9:00 pm! Of course it sounded brilliant when I was well rested, overfed (thank you, xmas!) and high on Christmas spirit.
And so I got up on January 2nd, 2017 at 5:10 am and I started the “Miracle Morning S.A.V.E.R.S routine. S.A.V.E.R.S stands for:
I had a few minutes of silence while I brushed my teeth, drank my water and got in my workout clothes. I tried to set my affirmations and visualize, but it turns out I’m total crap at that. I jumped on the treadmill and exercised (I’m good at that!) I ended my workout by reading a chapter in the Miracle Morning book and scribing my grocery list (I mean, scribing is scribing is scribing, right?) And I. FELT. GREAT. I got to the office with energy, I had accomplished more before 6:30 am than I had in days. I wasn’t stressed about dinner (remember my Blue Apron post???) because I had planned it out, I was relaxed and showered when the girls came downstairs for breakfast and I was proud of myself! Because I had beat the alarm! I hate the alarm! And Adele herself may as well have been whispering sweet nothings in my ear when my alarm went off that morning! I was excited about it!!!! Woooo!!! I was going to become a morning person.
Now remember, I am describing DAY ONE here. That day, I told anyone who would listen about “The Miracle Morning” and how it was changing my life!!!! In a day!!!!
Enter reality. The reality of a busy work schedule, two kids in school, one baby at home with the nanny, volunteer obligations, swim practice, ballet class, basketball games, a sick senior citizen dachshund, reliability problems with childcare, first communion prep, the stomach flu, misplaced keys etc. etc. etc. and by about day 6 I was HATING my alarm. Like, cursing Siri as I went to bed each night because the evil electronic wench was going to wake me up in 7, no 6, no 5, no 4 hours from now. But I still did it. I dragged myself out of bed and miserably went through the motions of the Miracle Morning.
Now, they say that it takes 60-90 days to create a habit, so I’m not quite there yet. But I’m approximately on day 52 of this miserable experiment and here is what I can say about it so far. Since I started on January 2nd, 2017:
- I have lost the last few lbs of baby weight and am at my healthiest weight since March of 2015.
- I met a crazy hard deadline at work that involved brand new material, thinking and curriculum. And I’m really proud of the work. A pride I haven’t felt in awhile.
- I gave up wine for the month of February (except for Saturdays… and special occasions… because I’m not a crazy person)
- I have read seven books (Best one so far? Grit by Angela Duckworth!)
- I got bangs. And while this might be an insignificant change, they represent a choice to take care of me!!!!)
- I have begun cooking in advance and freezing meals to help with the crazy nights when we’re all running around like headless chickens. (Maybe I’ll post some of the recipes!)
- I have made some difficult decisions in my personal life and have had some difficult conversations in my professional life. All things that needed to happen.
- I cleaned up my entire basement and decluttered my house.
- I have averaged 25k steps per day during the work week. Thank you, Fitbit!!!
And guess what? I still hate it. I still HATE my alarm going off in the morning. I am still total crap at affirmations and visualization. Sometimes my “scribing” is writing a note to my daughter, or a Facebook post to a friend. Sometimes I press snooze so I don’t have time to do everything, and sometimes I break the rules and just use my “Miracle Morning” time to drink coffee and complain to my mother about how much I hate this stupid Miracle Morning time.
I’m imperfect. And I may not ever love this routine. But notice the list of bullets above. They all start with “I.” And before this miserable exercise, I cannot tell you the last time I could have described something I was proud of that started with “I.” I could tell you about my gorgeous children and their amazing accomplishments, I could tell you about the incredible things my company was doing, I could tell you about my brothers, my friends, my parents… But it has been a good long while since I have been proud of little old me. Of JUST ME. And that feels good.
So, Miracle Morning…. I still hate you… But thank you for leading me back to me. Thank you for making me proud of me again. Thank you for helping me be the best version of myself. Even if that version is slightly sleep-deprived and over-caffeinated.
Things that made me happy today:
- A former colleague who has resurfaced in my life this past year. He was an inspiration and mentor to me 12 years ago, and he is again now. So thankful for him.
- My oldest daughter is giving a weather report at school tomorrow. She signs it off with “Stay classy, Nashville!” It’s the best thing I have ever heard in my life.
- My baby is almost 11 months old. This makes me immeasurably sad, but also happy because his little personality comes out a little bit more each day. And he’s RAD.
- My middle daughter kissed a boy on the playground three times yesterday. Now, this is bad and naughty, but it’s also a reminder of the innocence of youth and the pureness of love. They were “playing wedding” and husbands and wives kiss. We should all kiss more often.
- Jimmy John’s vegetarian sandwich. I am so sad that I didn’t discover Jimmy John until 2017. I have wasted so many years on mediocre sandwiches.
- A husband who drives me batty, but has my whole heart. I have never felt more proud to be married to that man than I do today. And I know that feeling will only grow tomorrow.